Friends and gossips, gather around for the tale of the century, an epic drama yet to unfold. The impudent tempest, Hillary, has stormed into our peaceful lives and is ripping up a havoc tornado bound to engrave its monstrous signature on our dear California, creeping into the Southwest by Saturday.

Now, don’t you dare underestimate the ferocity of this fury. This right here isn’t some run-of-the-mill tropical storm. Doomsday forecasters estimate that Hurricane Hillary will wildly swing her fiery lash with winds whipping up to an unthinkable 100 mph. Imagine the drama! It’s like something out of an apocalyptic nightmare!

Listen folks! Hold onto your sunscreen, because this scorching tale of blistering heat and furious fires is more dramatic than a soap opera rerun on a lazy Sunday afternoon. Not only is America’s beautiful geography under siege, but the very fabric of our daily life is teetering on a crispy edge.

Mother Nature, that unpredictable diva, has turned up the thermostat across this proud nation, producing a heatwave more relentless than a Fifth Avenue summer sale. Simultaneously - oh, and isn’t she the multi-tasker? - she’s spawned parching drought conditions that are spreading faster than the juiciest rumor at a Sunday brunch.

Well, heavens to Betsy, have you heard about this redacted police force saga? Turns out, our uniform-clad citizens on watch are up to some sneaky shenanigans, the sort of twisted circus could only happen when lady Liberty turns her back! Honey, grab your tea, we’ve got some serious kibitzing to do!

A nameless, anonymous band of boys in blue have devised the craftiest plot this side of the Mississippi! They’re employing the most cunning play in the book, if the book was written by Kafka, to keep an entire town in the dark over their identities. We’re living in a real-life whodunit, folks!

Oh, darling, put down that espresso and brace yourself! Our beloved Baltimore has just witnessed an episode that would put a Hollywood crime thriller to shame. Let’s rewind to that fatal July evening, can you stand the suspense?! Little did the party-goers know, their dance-offs and stiff martinis would soon be interrupted by eruptions of panic, as the barrel of a Glock reared its ugly head. A real showstopper, my dear! The villain of our piece? None other than our smooth operator, Terrell Homes, a name synonymous with more crime stories than I’ve even had hot dinners.

In a salacious turn of events that has the nation on tenterhooks, the diminutive King County Library System in Washington has become a veritable battleground. This unassuming haven of knowledge has been thrust into the limelight as the new public arena for the age-old tug-of-war: teenage literature’s supposed ’explicit’ content. However, it’s not the narrative you’ve heard before! Oh, no darling, we’re talking nuclear here! In this quiet corner of Washington, books are not merely falling off the shelves, they are practically being ejected in the heat of this bonfire of a disagreement. The library, tucked away within an innocent park, a perfect setting for a cozy rom-com movie, has turned into the theater of the nation’s first library closing - can you believe it?! The centerpiece of this plot is none other than Alexa Darrin, the leader of the group ‘Common Sense,’ who is on a mission to ‘cleanse’ the library of all things explicit and ‘adult.’ Shocking, isn’t it? But don’t think for a second that this drama unrolls without opposition. Enter stage left, the director of the King County Library System, Ken Harvey. Given the delicate nature of the subject, our charming director is not afraid of playing the diplomat and bridging the gap. However, between Darrin’s rallied troops and Harvey’s measured steps, the tension became too much, causing this thrill of a saga to reach its climax - the shut-down of the library. You read that right, ladies and gentlemen! It’s not everyday where you see a bastion of civilization’s light having its bulbs unscrewed. But it happened here. As we speak, the library doors remain closed – a fitting metaphor for the shut minds on both sides of this epic. Whether they will open again, or whether negotiations will lead to a ‘PG-13’ version of the former literary treasure trove is a tale yet unwritten. Like the finest dramaturgy, the final act of this story remains unknown, leaving us all hanging on the edge of our seats awaiting the resolution. Meanwhile, the town continues to buzz as whispers of the showdown reach every corner!

In the ceaseless drama of the steel and concrete jungle that’s Seattle, the city’s business owners are inching towards the edge, people! Businesses, once thriving pillars of prosperity, are now looped into an inescapable vortex of growing criminality and fear! Every hour, every minute, they’re agonizing in their desperate measures to safeguard their livelihoods against an unrelenting drug haven. Can you imagine? A city once known for its ethereal beauty turned into a real-life dystopian nightmare!

Don’t pretend your heart didn’t skip a beat when you heard about it - the stories of a heartbroken bus ride that plucked heartstrings across the Lone Star State. Close your eyes and picture it for just a minute. It’s Texas, it’s boiling, and there’s a convoy of buses amid the barren Texan scrubland, carrying an ensemble of migrant children, seeking a promised land.

Just a little 10-year-old girl - a child, dear readers - the age when the world should be full of unicorns and fairy tales. Alas, she fell into the merciless hands of an unforgiving Texas heatwave, on what was supposedly a journey towards hope and dreams. She left a war-torn region only to be incidentally swept off into oblivion.

In a tantalizing twist of ever-evolving saga that is our world’s struggle with menacing microbes, an electrifying report has unveiled that our knights in shining armor, the CDC, are all geared up to tango with the next big pandemic! That’s right, folks! Even though thousands are still grappling with the brute called Covid-19, our savior and defender, CDC, is already wearing its dancing shoes, ready to waltz into the battlefield with the next lethal virus.

In the second decade of the 21st century, Big Brother ‘artificial intelligence’ has cruelly flexed its digital muscles and proven yet again it’s far from infallible. A peaceful, heavily-pregnant Nijeer Parks, blissfully unaware of the impending catastrophe, found herself wrenched from her tranquil suburban life and catapulted into the harsh realms of a cold and indifferent justice system. Was she a hardened criminal mastermind?! Far from it. All thanks to unruly artificial intelligence and its rapidly spiralling facial recognition tech.